This is the weekend the zany members of the UTABL head north to isolate ourselves from the world and roll dice well past normal bedtime hours. Normally, a lot of off the wall activity happens at the cabin. Hey, what can you expect when eight guys go away for the weekend to eat and play a board game? While most of what happens at the cabin stays at the cabin, a few stories have leaked out to our families over the years. So in honor of our great “season starting” winter tradition, let me make my ten bold predictions of what will happen at the cabin this year that in reality mirror many things that have happened over the years.
1) Someone will attempt to destroy a set of dice. (Dice take the most abuse at the cabin, although most of it is verbal. But a few dice have been thrown, batted, or mutilated in some form. We still hope to find a previously lost pair of dice on the bank heading down to the creek.)
2) An outlandish, unbalanced, desperation trade proposal will be made. (Rarely completed, but the discussions are always interesting because of the names involved and the occassional bidding war that ensues.)
3) A nickname or phrase will be repeated ad nauseum. (Several years ago my team was so hot at the cabin that no one wanted to play me. They referred to us as ‘the Juggernauts’ after every run we scored. And who can forget Dave’s usage of the “Communist Barbaric …”)
4) Someone will burn themselves on the fireplace.
5) Tom will see a rat the size of Delaware in the wood shed.
6) A youtube video will be posted of the rookies bringing in firewood from the wood shed as they slip and stumble through the snow.
7) Winter Outdoor Homerun Derby will be won by another right handed line drive hitter who keeps the ball out of the wind. Our three lefties will once again be nearly shutout of the event by the large pine tree obstacle in right field.
8) Some poor army man toy figurine will be impaled on the dart board.
9) We will eat more food than we have eaten in a month. Yes, it’s the “Great Recession”, but you’d never know it around the table at the cabin. Larry has been a fabulous cook all these years and it sounds like we’ll have a few other substitute chefs this year. And speaking of food, there will be an argument over that last piece of apple sausage.
10) At least 80 games of APBA will be played. It will be loud and overbearing at time. Lots of guys trying to talk over each other. Someone shouting at his players for a boneheaded play. Someone else grumbling at his neighbor for invading his personal space. Dice clanging. Cards flying. Boards being studied and argued. Bedlam.
And to this APBA lover, it will be a fun weekend with lots of great memories with some of the best baseball guys I know.
Will I have dice thrown at my head if I insist on speaking in a pompous British accent all weekend? “Oh, smashing good hit Sir Jason Bay! Well done indeed ol’ chap!”
You might have to sleep with one eye open if you talk like that all weekend.
Remember last year when I got ticked at Johan getting hammered, I took off my Santana player jersey and slammed it down on the ground. I think Josh was a little shocked. Who knows what will happen if I hear a Limey talk.
Well, I’ll be chuffed to buggery and down right gobsmacked if we get to see your arse shirtless matey!
This cabin trip is becoming a tad intimidating all of a sudden…
Intimidation is part of the game. As a league, we use every psychological edge we can to win games … that is part of the fun.